Have you ever wondered what goes on in your brain to make it so that you are not attracted to people who you can intellectually determine to be beautiful? Is the process almost the same for everyone or is it vastly different?
With ex-lovers, I think that part of the process is that our illusions have been shattered and we tend to focus on those inconsequential flaws that we didn't even see when we were in love.
I once had the terrible experience of continuing to be physically attracted to an ex. This dissipated over time, but it was painful while it lasted.
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